Potato, potahto, tomato ... eggs?

Overheard on the downtown 2 train:

IMPRESSIONABLE LONG ISLAND COLLEGE STUDENT #1: His dad's name is JAN!
IMPRESSIONABLE LONG ISLAND COLLEGE STUDENT #2: You mean, like Yanni?

Now, I would have been right there with him if ILICS#1 had pronounced Jan like "yon," but he pronounced it like Jan Brady. And ILICS#2 didn't pronounce Yanni like "yan-nee," he pronounced it "yon-nee". So really, the conversation may as well have gone like this:

ILICS#1: If bark tasted like coconuts, I would drive it straight into the Grand Canyon.
ILICS#2: I know what you're saying, because mustard is Pez!

It's a good thing I saw this the other day



because otherwise I might never leave the house.