Recent overheards

A boy, roughly 3 years old, trudging up a flight of stairs leading up to Sixth Avenue from the B/D/F/V subway concourse:

"This ... is ... so ... much ... work ..."

*****

Group of early-twentysomethings walking south on University Place:

TWENTYSOMETHING GUY: So my cousin was like, "Dude, do this shot with me." And it was green and it made your poo green!

TWENTYSOMETHING GIRL: What was it?

TWENTYSOMETHING GUY: It was grass. It was, like, this grass that they squeeze. And you poo green. Terrible. I'm like, What is this shit?

*****

KEVIN: [leaning over my desk] Ugh, that person is driving me crazy.
ME: You're having issues with staff today.
KEVIN: Yes. It's true. I have a staff infection.